Washington DC – President Trump’s recent interview with FOX New’s Chris Wallace shows Trump defending his own cognitive faculties while attacking Democratic hopeful Joe Biden.
Chris Wallace to Trump on Trump’s cognitive test: “Well, it’s not the hardest test. It shows a picture and it says, ‘what’s that’. And it’s an elephant.” pic.twitter.com/7hnZphc1Rp
— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) July 19, 2020
Sources within the White House state the commander-in-chief studied hard for the exam. In practice sessions, one question President Trump got consistently wrong was “Who is the current President of the United States?”
Andrew Canard is a Cognitive Consultant from Miskatonic University, and he trained Trump. “We went through that question day and night,” he said. “I eventually had to write the question and answer on his hand in Sharpie.”
Mr. Canard listed who Trump thought is President:
- John F. Kennedy
“I wanted to give him half-credit for that last one, but the test doesn’t reward sarcasm.” Canard quipped.
Trump supporters insist that Trump didn’t really say those things. And if Trump actually said he doesn’t know who is President, then he didn’t mean it. And if he did mean it then it doesn’t matter because CNN is fake news.
Joe Biden has yet to comment on the recent turn of events. When he does, he will make sure President Trump will know who won’t be President come Inauguration Day 2021.
In related news, Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos is selling Trump Brand Bronzer.
Thought of the Day!
(I’m running a poll on Twitter and thought I’d share it here!)
Should kids be vaccinated against COVID-19 regardless of their parents’ objections?
— Professor Andrew Canard (@LaughPurgatory) July 20, 2020