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Award

 

What word do most YouTubers utilize to get themselves out of trouble? A detailed analysis of millions of videos by a myriad of creators find the word entertainer is invoked time and time again.

For example:

  1. Hey, I may have been factually wrong with the information presented in my last video, but I’m not a journalist. I’m an entertainer.
  2. My racist dog whistles a little too loud for your sensitive ears? Eat it, snowflake. By the way, I’m not racist. I’m an entertainer.
  3. My arguments don’t have to make sense. My fans are stupid, and I’m an entertainer.

“YouTubers use that word like Catholics say Hail Marys during confession,” quipped YouTube social psychologist Andrew Canard. “I heard one cognitively lazy jack ass say ‘I don’t have to debate anyone. I have a guy on my team who does that. I’m just an entertainer.'”

YouTube recently awarded Entertainer with its Annual Weasel Award (AWA). Previous winners include Maybe and the phrases Some Scientists as well as Is it Possible…?  The word Entertainer plans to display the AWA in its trophy case at home along with other honors like Selling Young Dudes Make it Rich Schemes Using Footage of Someone Else’s Private Jet and Yelling into the Camera Without Saying Anything.

Some of the more serious content creators on the platform admit it’s difficult to get people to watch anything that doesn’t include racist dog whistles, misogyny/boobies, and kittens.

“I got 300,000 views for my video about climate change,” stated one anonymous YouTuber. “But I had to make that hurricane racist as hell.”

Legitimate entertainers who have to work on their craft endlessly refuse to succumb to the Dark Side of YouTube.
This stubborn minority takes the time to make sure they aren’t pandering to the cognitively and morally impaired. While their message is strong they do use tactics that made their Sith Lord peers popular.

“I yell at the camera, but I diagram out all my arguments beforehand to make sure they are logically valid,” admitted one comedian who uses YouTube often. “My videos are funny but you don’t have to check your heart or brain at the door.”

Meanwhile, YouTube reports there are gaggles of new content creators ready to get their dog whistles on.

 


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Andrew Hall escaped a childhood of religious indoctrination and is now a non-miserable human being. He's made millions of people laugh as well as angry. (He hopes he's made the right people annoyed.) Targets...