Washington DC – Just when you think things can’t get any worse for Representative Kevin McCarthy, Elon Musk sends him into bankruptcy.
Speaker of the House McCarthy?
Representative McCarthy is trying, yet again, to be Speaker of the House, and he just can’t get enough votes from his own party. It seems that the radicals in this party of radicals don’t think he’s radical enough. Probable pedophile Matt Gaetz and failed restauranteur Lauren Boebert refuse to vote for McCarthy unless he bends to their demands.
Democrats in the House could, in theory, throw their support for McCarthy but that would probably cost him support from his own party. He’s in the trouble bubble and things just got worse.
Elon Musk tweets his support and bankrupts McCarthy
FOX News reports Twitter CEO Elon Musk tweeted his support for McCarthy to be Speaker early Thursday morning.
Within minutes of the tweet, creditors began contacting McCarthy saying that he is a terrible credit risk and that they are calling in each and every outstanding loan he has. It appears the representative was severely overexposed to risky investments and when the stock market tanked, so did his net value putting him in a very exposed position.
Canard Bank CEO Andrew Canard wanted to set the record straight. “Canard Bank loaned Representative McCarthy a lot of money because we believed he was going to pay us back. However, after former President Trump AND Elon Musk voice their support, well, we can’t be doing business with someone shady like him.”
It’s well known that Musk’s star has tarnished since he was forced to buy the social media platform. He owes over a billion dollars a year servicing the interest on the loan he used to purchase it. Once taking possession of the company he fired many vital employees, brought in beds for the surviving employees to sleep in, and now is being sued because he won’t pay rent.
Representative McCarthy’s office has not responded to this strange turn of events.
In related news: the 1 billion dollar ad campaign to put Jesus on toast is changing the way people see toast.