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Your humble servant.

After spending two days at the American Atheists Convention in Oklahoma City, a local man and professional curmudgeon reconfirms he is a Second Commandment Atheist.

”To the casual observer, I’m just a jerk. That’s just the outer crust. Once you get past the veneer of jerk there are the meaty bits of being a Second Commandment Atheist,” he relayed.

But what is a Second Commandment Atheist?

The Second Commandment states Thou shalt not make unto thee a graven image. While a vast majority of Christians ignore that divine dictate, most Muslims take it seriously. While this particular local man doesn’t believe in God, he knows a good idea when he sees it.

”Don’t idolize people. Sure, you may like their work. What you don’t want to do is put them on a pedestal and lose your sh*t if you meet them in public. Haven’t we learned anything from enshrining people into the pantheon of atheist gods only to realize later on they’re far from perfect?”

The local atheist realizes being a Second Commandment Atheist is unpopular. Many people attend conferences based on which celebrities are going to be there. It seems making atheist celebrities is vital to the atheist industrial-complex. “I’m just the opening act for the band on the Titanic,” he confesses. “I shout at the darkness and light the occasional candle while making fart jokes. That doesn’t make you popular.”

In his heart of hearts, he recognizes seeing Hugh Laurie at the American Atheists Convention was pretty cool. It’s too bad he didn’t get a selfie with him. 🙁


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Andrew Hall escaped a childhood of religious indoctrination and is now a non-miserable human being. He's made millions of people laugh as well as angry. (He hopes he's made the right people annoyed.) Targets...

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