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ferret

Social conservatives were right! What will be next on the liberal agenda?

San Fransisco, CA – Mathew Vickers and Snickerdoodles the Ferret married today. They are the first couple to benefit from San Fransisco’s new law allowing interspecies nuptials. Many on the right are crying out that social conservatives were right all along in saying gay marriage is a black diamond slippery slope that ends in man-ferret marriages.

What makes matters worse, states anti-ferret marriage advocate Reverend Andrew Canard, is that Mr. Vickers and Snickerdoodles are dudes:

What’s amazing is that this hadn’t happened already. We knew legalizing gay marriage and allowing bathrooms to undergo sex change operations would make a mockery of traditional American morality. How are we going to explain to our children what’s going on when they see homosexual man-ferret couples on the street?

While their marriage is creating a tempest of controversy, Mr. Vickers and Snickerdoodles are honeymooning in an undisclosed location. The only thing the duo asks is to stop asking them Which one of you guys is the husband?

In unrelated news, Google reports there has been a spike in searches for ferret porn in the state of Mississippi.

 

*You know, there are some jokes/Poes that are best kept short. If that Borowitz  Borowitz  fellow can write super short pieces why can’t I?

 


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Andrew Hall escaped a childhood of religious indoctrination and is now a non-miserable human being. He's made millions of people laugh as well as angry. (He hopes he's made the right people annoyed.) Targets...