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Washington DC – President Trump warned the public today of the United States Post Service (USPS) joining forces with Planned Parenthood and The Satanic Temple. Their goal? This so-called Axis of Evil is spread ‘mail order abortions’ throughout the United States of America.

The Post Office wants to kill babies with Planned Parenthood. The Satanist Temple is mailing kits for abortions. Must stop Satan!

The Post Office Under Seige

President Trump is looking to hobble the USPS in order to stop mail-in voting. It’s seen by many experts as a ploy by Trump to disrupt or delay the election in November.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is considering calling Democrats back from their August recess to tackle the problem.

Democrats are looking to address organizational issues at the Postal Service in the coming weeks, not to provide additional funding at this time, according to sources familiar with the discussion.

One option would be to vote on a modified version of a bill introduced by House Oversight Chair Carolyn Maloney (D-N.Y.) earlier this week that would prohibit USPS from implementing a planned organizational overhaul that critics maintain would handicap mail-in voting.

Satanic Abortions In The Mail?

The Satanic Temple recently launched its Reproductive Rights Campaign. 

SATANIC ABORTIONS ARE PROTECTED BY RELIGIOUS LIBERTY LAWS.

In accordance with the Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA), first trimester abortions are now exempt from unnecessary regulations for all individuals practicing The Satanic Temple’s religious abortion ritual.
In theory, TST is using religious liberty laws to protect women seeking abortions from things like mandatory waiting periods, compulsory counseling, and required reading materials.

TST offers those practicing the Satanic Abortion Ritual a letter to show officials that they are exempted from the aforementioned restrictions on their right to have an abortion.

I am a pregnant person and a Satanist beginning the process of an abortion ritual. I am aware that State law implements generally-applicable restrictions on abortions. However, State law also provides for religious exemptions to generally-applicable rules which impose a substantial burden on religious beliefs or practices. This letter lays out my claim for a religious exemption to generally-applicable restrictions on abortions.

As an adherent to the principles of The Satanic Temple (“TST”), my sincerely-held religious beliefs include:

  •  My body is inviolable and subject to my will alone.
  • I may make decisions regarding my health based on the best scientific understanding ofthe world, even if the religious or political beliefs of others fail to account for the science.
  • My inviolable right to bodily autonomy includes the right to make decisions about fetalor embryonic tissue I carry, provided that the tissue is unable to survive outside my bodyas an independent human being.
  •  I, alone, decide whether to remain pregnant and, in my sole discretion, may disregard thecurrent or future condition of any fetal or embryonic tissue I carry.
And while TST isn’t offering mail order abortions, they are raffling away Satanic Abortion Ritual kits that will be sent to winners via the postal service. However, the kits are not the main prize.

One lucky grand prize winner will win an abortion.

1. Grand Prize (1 person)
Minimum Donation: $200
Win a free abortion. The Satanic Temple will cover the medical expenses for your pregnancy termination up to $2,500. This prize is transferable.

In related news, a local atheist decided to become a vegetarian. 


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Andrew Hall escaped a childhood of religious indoctrination and is now a non-miserable human being. He's made millions of people laugh as well as angry. (He hopes he's made the right people annoyed.) Targets...