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Reddit user Colm-Sonny-Larry posed the question What would you put in a pentagram to summon a Boomer? on the subreddit WhitePeopleofTwitter and some of the answers are hilarious and cut to the quick.

Here are a few of the answers.

A good boomer? A DVD of George Carlin’s stand up

A bad boomer? An autographed copy of The Art of the Deal

– 500CatsTypingStuff

A Jimmy Buffett CD

– Techinical_Stallion_2

A scrap of paper, written thereon, in cursive: “All lives matter.”

– Flahdagal

A deed to a $800,000 house that they paid $28,000 in 1971

– Odd-Kaleidoscope9430

Facebook logo

– Commercial-Strike-19


– EyeAmPrestoo0

A hill that goes up on both sides.

– Maij-ha

a POC minding their own business

– Flowerinthevalley

A picture of Ronald Reagan

– DharmaSimmer

A union job with a living wage and retirement and healthcare benefits. But the job is making sure no one else gets those things.

– unoriginalname86

In case you’re wondering, Gosh, that’s pretty hard on Boomers. What do you have to say about your own generation, Mr. Hall?

I’m so glad you asked.

I expressed some of my thoughts on my generation in the piece I’m a Gen-Xer: Don’t expect me to lead when shots are fired.

Here’s a bit from it.

The main reason why we like flying under the radar so much is that you all should hate us so very, very much. We sucked off the teat of Boomer America. We are the last generation to grow up in the Homer Simpson household. One parent could hold down a blue-collar job that fed, clothe, and put a roof over our heads. Many of us graduated college with no debt. 

And we did nothing to earn it. And then we squandered it.

Let me defend the Boomers for a moment. Boomers pushed the boundaries of civil rights, the environmental movement, and pop music. What did Gen Xers do? We road their coattails and then we crap all over the Millenials and Zers when they want to push the boundaries of civil rights, the environmental movement, and music.

I’ve been told by my Zer associates if I write HA-HA! then you can’t hold what I write against me in a court of anger.


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Andrew Hall escaped a childhood of religious indoctrination and is now a non-miserable human being. He's made millions of people laugh as well as angry. (He hopes he's made the right people annoyed.) Targets...