United Nations, New York City – The World Health Organization (WHO) announced they have named a new psychological disorder after President Donald J. Trump.
WHO Director Andrew Canard stood in front of the General Assembly of the United Nations and explained the reasoning:
The current President of the United States of America sums up what it is to be an intellectually impaired narcissistic meglomaniac with impulse control issues. We at the World Health Organization understand several psychological diagnoses can be used to explain this constellation of maladaptive personality traits. However, our Mental Health Committee unanimously agreed President Trump is more than the sum of several personality and affective disorders. He has given birth to an entirely new psychological malady. He is patient zero for Donald Trump Syndrome.
Donald Trump Syndrome (DTS) is regarded by WHO as a pernicious and chronic condition that arises in childhood due to not getting enough hugs. Symptoms include but are not limited to:
- Recurring problems with the law (including special prosecutors, bankruptcy, and impeachment )
- The inability to stitch together a linear thought or sentence
- A toxic disregard for the well being of others
- Assuming the act of bullying is in fact leadership
- The chronic abuse of social media
- A low sense of self-worth that manifests itself with branding everything in sight with the word Trump.
The General Assembly immediately voted to support WHO’s newest psychological disorder classification. All the nations present were in favor of it except for the United States and Israel.
Edward Stettinius, Jr. is the United States Ambassador to the United Nations and warned the body he would not tolerate President Trump defamed in such a manner. He stormed out of the building informing all who voted in favor of Donald Trump Syndrome that they will never be invited to Mar-a-Lago for delicious Trump Steaks and Trump’s very own wine-in-a-box.
President Trump has not yet tweeted a response to the recent course of events. Psychologists and other mental health professionals are expecting an explosive release of Donald Trump Syndrome on that social media platform.