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Posted inComedy

The man who met Methuselah

Reading Time: 4 minutes The Man of the Dart. The Man of the Javelin. Sacred texts say he was the oldest person who ever lived… His name was Methuselah and—in spite of the fact that he is a well-known figure in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam—he is still a largely an enigma centuries after his death.  Or at least… he […]

Posted inComedy

The Jesus-Analog Cat, The Boring Old Biddy, and the Unsupervised Kitchen Appliance – Chapter 3

Reading Time: 8 minutes Lola ran out of the junky room down the hallway, looking for her siblings. Primarily because there wasn’t anyone else to talk to. “Pay attention,” she snapped. “I’m back!” “What in God’s name are you talking about, Lola?” sneered Sadie. “You haven’t been wondering where I was? Wait, don’t answer that.” “I’ll answer that,” Parker […]

Posted inSatire

Look Out! It’s the End of the World! Again!

Reading Time: 8 minutes To sensible adults who’ve read a book, current events in Ukraine look like the unhinged flailing of an old man with a micro-penis, but, to people with bloodthirsty imaginary friends, IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT! AGAIN! This time for real, though! Haha, no. Not really. For that to be the […]

Posted inSatire

Kickin’ It with the Son of Satan!

Reading Time: 2 minutes What’s it like to be Christianity’s greatest supervillain, plot to take over the world, and inspire dread in millions of evangelicals and conspiracy theorists before you’ve graduated from high school? We caught up with the Angel of Darkness to find out! When you’re hanging out in your room, hucking cupcakes at the wall, and thinking […]

Posted inComedy

The Jesus-Analog Cat, The Boring Old Biddy, and the Unsupervised Kitchen Appliance – Chapter 1

Reading Time: 8 minutes ONCE THERE WERE FOUR CHILDREN whose names were Parker, Sadie, Emmett, and Lola. This story is about something that allegedly happened to them which necessitated many years of therapy. It began when they were sent away from their home “because of the war.” Of course, this was just what they were told. The children—all except […]