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Posted inComedy

New study shows conservative men believe uteruses are communists

Reading Time: 2 minutes A new study by the Theological Institute of Technology shows that an overwhelming percentage of conservative men believe uteruses are communists. Researchers asked 3,474 self-identified conservative men what they thought of the female reproductive system. Even though the scientists expected extreme answers, they were surprised by the results. 88% consider uteruses are communists. 72% believe […]

Posted inSatire

‘What Kind of Liar Are You?’ The game show and national craze

Reading Time: 3 minutes Carl (announcer): Today’s show is sponsored by Dissembler Nation, the resume and CV organizer unit that “Gets You Jobs!” Audience: [rousing applause] Dave (host): Everyone lies sometimes, don’t they? What kind of a liar are you? Our celebrity panel will choose among today’s contestants and the winner will be taking home a pile of cash along with a wax statuette […]

Posted inSatire

Why is Ted Cruz so unpopular?

Reading Time: 2 minutes Senator Ted Cruz is unpopular. The general public does not like him. He’s the butt of countless jokes on Saturday Night Live. Even his fellow Republican lawmakers find him intolerable to be around. But why? Here are a few news stories illustrating why Ted Cruz is so unpopular. Ted Cruz abandoned Texans in their hour […]

Posted inComedy

Social media alternatives to Twitter and Elon Musk

Reading Time: 2 minutes Millions are looking for a social media alternative to Twitter due to American oligarch Elon Musk buying out the company and taking it private. Those looking to leave Twitter are worried that Musk’s leadership will cause the platform to devolve into a Proud Boys rally led by former President Donald J. Trump. But what are […]

Posted inComedy

Try our streaming service, Commercial Palooza, that offers the best payment plans!

Reading Time: < 1 minute At Commercial Palooza, we know what you really want: more commercials and less programming. So, try one of our payment plans that aim to please, at ridiculously low rates!  $3.99/month This option features a solid hour-long block of commercials that has been conveniently placed right before and during that climactic scene where you’re supposed to […]

Posted inComedy

Disney is evicting Florida Governor Ron DeSantis

Reading Time: 2 minutes The Walt Disney Corporation is evicting Governor Ron DeSantis, and he has 30 days to vacate the governor’s mansion. Lawyers from the Magic Kingdom served the eviction notice at 5 am local time. The half-asleep DeSantis had no idea what was going on. Governor DeSantis declared war on Disney. Disney stands with the LGBTQ community. […]

Posted inComedy

The man who met Methuselah

Reading Time: 4 minutes The Man of the Dart. The Man of the Javelin. Sacred texts say he was the oldest person who ever lived… His name was Methuselah and—in spite of the fact that he is a well-known figure in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam—he is still a largely an enigma centuries after his death.  Or at least… he […]

Posted inComedy

GOP’s Earth Day paper towels actually kill the planet

Reading Time: 2 minutes In an attempt to clean up its anti-environment and pro-pollution image, the GOP unveiled its Earth Day paper towels. Unfortunately for the rest of us, the paper towels are far worse than the run-of-the-mill ones. The Earth Day paper towel burns the skin if you touch it without protection. Wear gloves! Consumer advocate Andrew Canard […]