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My personal go-to when replacing the word “God” is Lemmy. As in the rock god Lemmy Kilmister. Like when someone sneezes I might say, “Lemmy blesses you.” Or “Lemmy help me, my boss is an idiot.”

But saying “Oh my Lemmy,” during sex, particularly if the person’s name doesn’t happen to be Lemmy, could be a bad thing.

Oh my Sagan!

What a way to honor a secular icon! Or not, your call.

Hitch-slap my ass!

Another dubious ode to a famous freethinker.

Sweet baby Odin!

Not bad, although citing the God of war and death might not be my first choice.

That’s it!

Always good to let your partner know when they’re doing something right.

Oh, thank physics!

This would work especially well if getting creative with your positions.

Oh my dopamine!

A bit of a mouthful if you ask me, but better than other drugs.

Holy Thor’s hammer!

As a Thor fan, I can get behind this one.


Good thing they found it!

Science Ruuuules!

Yes. Yes it does.

 Oh my God’s a myth

Maybe not the best way to let your partner know you’re an atheist.

And if you’re from California, you can always just go with “Duuude!”

*shout out to my Twitter and Facebook followers for the suggestions.

I'm a former adult entertainer and author of Dirty Money: Memoirs of a Stripper and Expose Yourself: How to Take Risks Question Everything and Find Yourself- Humor and Insights from my life as a Stripper....