Reading Time: 9 minutes Christians demonstrate by their actions that they know perfectly well their god couldn’t manage to arrange a visit to the potty without them helping him every step of the way.
Captain Cassidy’s Fundagelicalism 101 Class Now In Session
Posted inGeneral
Christianese 101: Translating Evangelists’ Success Stories
Reading Time: 10 minutes Hi and welcome back! Sometimes, it’s fun to reveal the real meaning of all the Christianese that evangelicals use. Because oh, they use a lot of it. And the more Christianese you see in use, the less the Christians involved have to say that’s real and true. So when I say that evangelism might just be the […]
Posted inReligion
Let’s Play: Beach Reach Training!
Reading Time: 10 minutes Hi and welcome back! Yesterday, we had a refresher about Beach Reach. That’s the annual Spring Break missionary trip sponsored by the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC). Every year, hundreds of young SBC-lings converge on a beach in Texas to offer various free services to partying college students. Of course, they only offer these services to […]
Posted inReligion
Christianese 101: Greg Locke, False Prophet Edition
Reading Time: 9 minutes Today, I want to show you one of these false prophets, Greg Locke. He girded himself with Christianese in hopes of providing himself with plausible deniability. His predictions failed spectacularly, thankfully. However, his use of Christianese to do it caught my interest. Let me show you what he said, what it meant, and how cowards like him use this jargon to try to escape the consequences of their constant strings of failures.
Posted inReligion
The Poor Widdle Heathens in ‘Only God Can’
Reading Time: 9 minutes Hi and welcome back! We saw a movie recently, Only God Can, that covered quite a few tropes in fundagelical thinking. Today, we’ll be covering one of the most-beloved ones of those tropes: the idea that TRUE CHRISTIANS™ are much happier and more functional than poor widdle heathens ever could be. Come to Fundagelical U […]
Posted inReligion
Evangelicals, Their Witness, and Why It’s Falling Apart Lately
Reading Time: 9 minutes Hi and welcome back! Off and on, I’ve mentioned a bit of Christianese that’s key to understanding the mask-wearing of evangelicalism. It affects and impacts their credibility level and power-base among people who know them (or at least know about them). They call this measurement their witness. And evangelicals value it enormously–or at least, they did […]
Posted inReligion
A Remedial Course at Fundagelical U (LSP #60)
Reading Time: 7 minutes It never fails to astonish me, how often TRUE CHRISTIANS™ need remedial educations in how to act like human beings. Today, I thought I’d offer a remedial course right here at Fundagelical University to address fundagelicals’ inability to relate to others.
Posted inUncategorized
The Unequally Yoked Club: Terrible Christian Marriage Advice, Graded
Reading Time: 10 minutes Last time we met up, we talked about why Christians have such a bizarrely-regressive view of marriage. In essence, rigidly codified relationships help keep their authoritarian vision alive. Today, let’s dive into the rules that get that rigid view ensconced in people’s everyday realities.