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The Onion does funny fiction almost as well as religion does funny fiction:

Saying he was not the least bit surprised to see the former member of the congregation again, pastor James Bower told reporters Thursday that he always knew agnostic local resident Chris Parker would come crawling back to the church to get married.
I believe Chris stopped attending services when he was about 12 and hasn’t set foot in the church since, but guess who finally came around? And just months before the ceremony, no less,” said Bower, adding that Parker just showed up after 15 years of absence with hat in hand to reserve the Calvary United Church and beg the pastor to officiate.

For satirists, religion is the gift that keeps on giving. See also here, here, and here.